Meals For Ballers on a Budget

CHAPTER I

“Tacos a la Man”

I dedicate this chapter to Kroger and their lackluster security. Without you none of this would have been possible. Thank you for your donations.

INGREDIENTS

Tomatoes

Carrots

1lb Ground Beef

Green Beans

Taco Seasoning

Whole Wheat Tortillas

Cucumber

Onion

Shreded Cheese

STEPS

1. Put ground beef in skillet. Turn heat to a medium low. Let meat fry until brown. Periodically stir and chop the meat until it is in bite size morsels.

2. While meat is browning, gather up the veggies and begin to chop them down to size.

You can buy these for 3 bucks a vine at Kroger or you can just pluck 2 or 3 off a vine and steal them. The thieving way will result in a minor loss of karma but I recently saved some orphans from a burning building so I’m good. Judge for yourself how much karma you can afford to lose when gathering ingredients for your meal.

3. The meat should be finished by now. Reduce heat and drain the meat of any excess fat.

Don’t worry, I assure you that’s not a cup full of piss. It’s just cow meat juice.

4. Add in the taco seasoning and ¾ a cup of water. Stir until properly blended. Turn heat back to a medium setting so the meat can bring itself to a boil.

5. Rip open those tortilla shells and shove em in the oven. Put the oven on broil and let them bake for about 2 to 3 minutes. Check frequently!

With the help of Ms. Frizzle I was able to shrink myself down to one tenth my normal size and captured the baking of the tortillas from inside the oven. PLEASE DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME.

6. Once the meat is finished boiling, turn off heat stupid.Tortillas should be finished by now so begin to pile on the goodness.

7. For the purposes of the viewer I individually piled on the toppings. For better results, find yourself a cup, plastic wrap, and rubber band. Pour all the vegetables in the cup and seal it up with plastic wrap and rubber band. Shake the cup like the bitch owes you money. Now you have yourself a cup full of evenly mixed toppings. YEAH!

8. The most important step. BON APETITE!

Advertisements

One response to “Meals For Ballers on a Budget

Am i wrong?...Am i?..And the church said

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s