Today’s tale centers not on me but a very good friend of mine by the name of Curron or as I like to call him, Jaguar Paw. It all began at 9am in the morning when I awoke with great determination to topple the mountain of mess that had accumulated in my house. Having conquered that beast, I go over to my pal Jaguar Paw’s den and the true story begins.
JP was very excited because today was the day that he would get to meet the princess that he had been courting. Knowing she was to be performing at a concert, JP decided to attend the show and finally meet his muse. I left to go back to my place and while getting ready to cook some tacos, I hear a “knock knock” on my door. Opening it, JP informs me that he locked himself out of the den and had no way to get back in. After a failed attempt to talk the landlord into opening the door for him, JP, The Chai, and I brainstormed over what he could do while stuffing our faces with tacos.
JP tried calling the Black Mamba, his roommate but his howls were left unanswered. With a dead line to be at the concert by 7pm, JP and I decided to run some errands first while waiting for Mamba, the first being to go to Sam’s Flax and pick up some supplies. Along the way we run into a couple of Gher Bears who were off on an adventure of their own. That’s when JP gets the call from Mamba to go back to the landlord and talk to him. So we turn around and JP is able to get back into the den to which we hit the restart button on the Sam Flax adventure.
After tip toeing through construction sites, holding our breath through dust storms, and hiking mountainous hills, we made it. Calves burning with the fire of a thousand splendid suns, I take a knee while JP goes on his shopping spree. To his surprise all canvases were discounted 70% off so after some careful mental math, deductive reasoning, and the knowledge that he would most likely go hungry for the next week, we ended up leaving with 5 canvases at $100 and some change. A small fortune to pay for a future masterpiece I think.
But now the real trial began. The journey to Sam Flax was hard enough but now we had to walk back with an arm full of canvases. I originally wanted to theif a cart from Sam Flax but the honorable JP talked me out of it and instead we heaved the canvases down the street on foot. A few paces and my mind was already beginning to dread the journey. I just wished someone, anyone would seek pity on us and help us out. And that’s exactly what happened.
A kind-hearted, saint of a woman named Cheryl, with ebony locks of exquisite beauty slowed her red car to a halt, rolled down her windows, and said three magical words; “need a ride?” JP looked a little taken aback but being a veteran of many hitch hike adventures, I jumped at the opportunity and loaded the canvases in the car. Cheyrl was just coming off of work at a fabric store down the street and took pity on us so decided to offer us a ride. Hailing from the isles of Jamaica, her accent enthralled her every word as she told us more about herself and we to her. Dropping us off at the den, we heartily thanked her and delivered the canvases back to the house after which we downed a refreshing bottle of pineapple Smirnoff.
JP then suited up in his Saturday best in preparation to meet the woman of his dreams. Today ends my rendition of the tale but something tells me this story is far from being finished.