Natural vs Chemical: How do you prefer your hair?

Before I begin, a friend asked me to do a write-up of natural hair vs permed hair for her magazine. Normally I wouldn’t be caught dead in this discussion because it’, excuse my french, fucking retarded. But I guess if Chris Rock can make a movie about it the least I can do is write a half assed report. Now to begin…

The age-old negro debate, should I wear my hair as it was naturally given or should I perm it with man-made chemicals? In this report I will attempt to answer this question. While this report might seem biased keep in mind that I am only reporting my opinion which just happens to be the truth.

 

HISTORY

We should all know the history of processed hair at this day and age. If you don’t I’ll give you the cliff notes version. A long time ago, but not s long that people don’t remember, a certain type of folk began enslaving another type of folk. It sucked and then one day the enslaved people were granted freedom, but not really. It was a false type of freedom because while “legally” their bodies were no longer in bondage their minds were. The mentality had been twisted to think that everything European was good and everything African (natural to themselves) was bad. Hence the creation of “good hair” and “bad hair.” The newly “freed” people tried everything they could to mimic their captures, even going so far as to put harmful chemicals in their hair to burn it straight instead of its natural coiled state. The moral of the story, the act of perming ones hair began as an act of self hate and the trend continues today.

 

HEALTH

I won’t bother looking up scientific facts and figures for writing something that common sense tells us is true. Perming your hair leads to bald spots, stunted hair growth, scalp irritation, and the mental fact that you kinda hate yourself. But don’t worry about that, you do you.

 

MAINTENANCE

Natural hair does indeed take many hours of maintenance in comparison to processed hair.  On the flip side, processed hair is more restricting in the fact that you can’t do simple things like getting your hair wet, allowing people to touch it or sweat. Yup, you heard the correctly people who get perms are not allowed to sweat.

In the next issue we will talk about soul food and why eating it is harmful to the soul. How so you ask? Ever heard of diabetes? Yup…

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Am i wrong?...Am i?..And the church said

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