Hey Guh, Lemmie Brrw Yo Flash Drive

It had been a year and some change
Since his last gospel
And through all that time
The editing process had not gotten
Any simpler
In fact this would begin todays
Set of dilemmas
In order to graduate past
The first stage of editing errors
Our protagonist
Would have to search and find
A new computer to send the files
As his decrepit dinosaur
Was not up to task
This would require the skills
Networking & Public Communication
Two skills our protagonist hated
Had access to in spades


I used to love to write
All day, all night
Posting my discoveries
Along a web
World wide
So that even outer space
Could see

One day a shear of fear
Snipped that web
Buried the discoveries
Fearing that
Someone would steal them from me
So i Stopped

Hid the discoveries
In books and tomes
Charging fees for a right to see them
But the thrill wasn’t the same
Americans don’t read books
Especially those composed of poetry
Spoken from
An unwealthy unknown

But the people most like me do
So i restrung the web
Posting my discoveries
So even outer space could see
Beacons for those searching for
An inner me

Or Maybe

Maybe he was best fit for the frontier life
Tall grasses swaying in the wind
long, sweaty, summer days complete with
apple pies coolin on a window sill…

Or maybe
he was just bullshitting himself
Influenced by a cheesy period flick
Like butterless popcorn to most but
he had a fetish
a certain attraction to these old timey filters
as if somehow familiar..

On Kids

If you already have kids then cool, this information isn’t for you. Got you in the next article though.

If however you are a child virgin and are thinking about getting one STOP: It’s a Setup. Children are a mulfuckin trap if I’ve ever seen one. Trust me on this dawg, TRUST ME. I used to be a kid so I know…Kids and the idea behind the nuclear familiy unit are just distractions to keep your ass contained to “that box” because when you have these things it places a chain on you and that chain is wrapped guts deep around your freedom.

If you do have kids i have no advice other than maybe ya’ll should form support based settlements with other parents cuz that shit is hard to do own your own, as you already know. Maybe ya’ll can setup some type of system where the older kids babysit the younger kids while the adults are out makin that paper but that would have to imply that as a parent, you were doing your job. Your job is simply to teach them on how to best survive in whatever climate/culture ya’ll are fuckin with.

Traditionally, one parent would win the bread while the other would stay and teach. In today’s modern American society it is ┬áhard for single parents to raise a family on minimum wage so usually both parent are out there on the hustle and don’t have time to teach as they should. When this is the case you should rely on a heady hand of discipline but also get super fucking creative with your teaching style. Like maybe making pre-recorded videos, art, books, a mixtape, caard game, SOMETHIN, anything that stresses the values and shit you are trying to instill.

I understand all too well the desire to want to have a kid. Genetically we are all programmed in a special way geared towards reproduction. Men wanna punt, women wanna carry and vice versa. But if you don’t have those resources to actually give the kid a good fucking headstart, maybe you should keep it wrapped and curve those parental emotions into an animal slave. People usually like cats and dogs, that type of shit. A fight against your genetic coding will be the hardest fight you’ll have have to face because you gotta duel that bitch daily but with practice and discipline you can break the code.

Iron Palm Resistance Training For Defense Against Police

Building the strength of your palms via resistance training can help you catch those police batons when they come hurling towards your face. How you ask? (ok you didn’t but imma tell you anyway)

Step 1: Take your hand and raise it a few inches above a hard service. Palm orientation facing away from you.

Step 2: slap your hand on surface. Lightly at first and then progressively harder.

Step 3: Don’t break your fucking hand

Step 4: Keep up the repetition till your nerves are numb. Resume process after 2 days of rest.

Now you’re ready to catch those police batons when they come swingin for ya!
And remember…
If your kung-fu ain’t aimed at ending the police state then your kung-fu ain’t shit.

Black Blooded Sol Thief

Cutting myself on the blanks, these pages
Black blood empties out
How many pens have i drained to further my addiction?

A vampire who chose to abstain, draining ink instead of ki
I can give you joy, take away your pain
But i’ve chosen to abstain

A vamp who does not feed remains weak
Buried underneath the blanks, these pages
I continue to sleep
Hoping never again to re-awake

Sedating my appetite, draining the blood of pens
Temporary relief from the sol thief within